I go to a local high school. In fact, we have talked, and you said I should send you an e-mail. So here it is.
I want to know how I can get my parents off my back. They want me to tell them every thing I am doing. They tell me I am going to fail. They ask me about my school work; and they ask over and over. I get sick of it — and angry. Then we get into fights.
I don't want to fight with my folks. It's just that high school is boring except for my friends. I want to get my diploma, but they are making it really hard for me. What can you tell me and what can you tell them?
Strangely enough, I agree with you.
This is, indeed, a free country, and you have your own body and life. Therefore, you should be completely free to fail. If you wish to do so utterly and miserably, that is your business.
Of course, failing has its price. One is a four-letter word seldom heard in the halls of a typical American high school. The word is "work." If you do not care for the work in your high school, an everyday job might help. Maybe you should quit and earn your own living. By your own admission you are free to do so.
The jobs might not be inviting. There may be long hours. There is the fun of getting up early and maybe dealing with a cranky boss. And by the way, you haven't seen "boring" until you join the toiling set. Your friends can meet you in the evening and fill you in on what you missed that day.
The fact is, you do have the privilege and right of failing. You will find many people willing to help you accomplish this. Some may even be your "friends."
I would never argue that a typical high school is brimming with inventiveness, excitement, and cutting-edge ideas. Or, it may often be the opposite. But I would argue that a high school is a place to grow up. It does provide some things you might want to learn and some relationships, from friends and faculty, that are with you for life.
The decision is up to you. By the way, your parents might want you to begin paying your own way. I dare you to show them this column!
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Dr. Larry Larsen is an Andover psychologist. If you would like to ask a question, or respond to one, you can e-mail Dr. Larry Larsen at lrryllrsn@CS.com.
