— “While averse to wearing yarmulkes themselves, hipsters make sure their pets are dressed appropriately. That said, those Hanukkah sweaters from Geltfiend are pretty great.”
— “Forget ‘A Christmas Story’ or ‘It’s a Wonderful Life,’” urged Samuels-Schwartz. “Jewish hipsters watch Hanukkah horror movies,” he said, with fans of the genre anxiously anticipating the slasher “Hanukkah.”
“Until the day ‘Hanukkah’ is actually made, they usually stick with Jonathan Kesselman’s ‘The Hebrew Hammer,’” he said.
As for the actual Festival of Lights, said Samuels-Schwartz: “For a while, Jewish hipsters celebrated Festivus, but it’s just become way too commercial. Now they just celebrate Christmas.”