LAWRENCE — One fall afternoon, Kelley Mikus, Gia O'Connor and Katie Zenevitch visited coach Sue Downer in Central Catholic's small athletic office. The three captains wanted to know if it would be OK to dedicate the season to Donald Stewart, Downer's late father.
"Obviously it was," Downer said.
After all, "Disco Don" as his daughter lovingly nicknamed him because of his dance moves, wore his red Central baseball cap like a badge of honor. He always watched the Raiders play from the last few rows of the bleachers. Every game, he'd cheer and offer advice.
"He was a constant presence," said assistant coach Zibby McCleary, a 2001 Central graduate.
So when the 75-year-old Air Force veteran and long-time Equifax office manager succumbed to a heart attack on Oct. 17, Central Catholic girls basketball took a big hit. Downer was close to her dad, who coached her basketball team at St. Monica School in Methuen.
"I guess it's no wonder I fell into the passion of coaching," she said. "He was always involved somehow."
In a way, he still is. At the end of each pre-game prayer, the players say "dad" in unison.
Downer's mother Joan, Don's wife of 45 years, still attends all of her daughter's — and four grandchildren's — games.
"It has absolutely been therapeutic for her," Downer said.
Joan, Downer said, has enjoyed the run to today's (6:30 p.m.) Division 1 North final.
"(Basketball's) just been a part of their lives for so long," said Downer, a former Merrimack College star (1,020 points, 519 rebounds) who was an All-Scholastic at the now defunct St. Mary's High in Lawrence. "It's a positive for her to have something to look forward to."
"Those girls did it," Joan said to Downer after Central's win over Lynn English Wednesday.
Don was no less supportive. Sophomore forward Melissa Miller remembers him pulling her aside last year.
"I'm so proud of you," he told her. "I can't wait to see what you can do in the future."
Finding her voice
After the Raiders beat Peabody in the 2005 North final at Tsongas Arena, assistant coach Karen Young remembers Downer pointing at her father, who was sitting in the stands. The two clearly shared a connection. But that doesn't mean he went easy on her.
From the time Downer picked up a basketball, Don gave her feedback.
"If I didn't play well, he told me," she said of her father, who graduated from Central Catholic in 1951 and later attended Merrimack College. "I learned a lot from that."
Specifically, it taught her personal responsibility. If she tried to make excuses, she said, "he wasn't going to listen."
And Don never held back his opinion.
"He always thought he was right," Downer said with a smile. "He was very confident, very sure of himself."
The two talked business and politics over the years. His confidence, she said, never approached cockiness or arrogance.
His words always seemed to fit the situation. After the Raiders lost to Springfield Central in the 2007 state final, he told his daughter, without a hint of bitterness or anger, "The better team won."
"He was very wise," she said.
With Don as her tutor, Downer found her voice as a coach.
"He made sure I had a good understanding of the world," she said. "(He taught me) to really be proactive."
Downer's players, to their credit, were proactive in the days after Don's passing. They came to his wake as a team.
"The girls," Downer said, "have been absolutely incredible."
Even if Central draws a big crowd at Emmanuel College's Jean Yawkey Center today, something will be missing. In a perfect world, Don would be in the bleachers.
Like clockwork, McCleary said, constructive critiques would be doled out after the game, win or lose.
"It's almost like he was Yoda," McCleary said, referencing the wisdom-dispensing "Star Wars" character, "watching from above, then coming down and giving us nuggets (of advice)."
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